AS REQUESTED

Dear MA,

You definitely need to comment on the need for a ban on the shorty(**** ******* style) shorty shorts in your next issue. There was a guy wearing some gay looking shorts this morning that made ***** blush. Also the tshirts continue to make unannounced sudden lane changes that cause my HRM to spike.

OK....here is the deal....the above request was sent to me from an un-named source who raises a legitimate concern. The names of the guilty parties have been removed to protect those who MAY be feeling guilty about this rather horrific breach of cycling etiquette.

There are a few steadfast rules that apply to ALL group rides. I won't rehash the obvious "rules" of group riding.

But one thing is FOR CERTAIN. There is a rule concerning acceptable cycling shorts length. That rule is that the bottom of your shorts should be within a "few" inches of your knee.

An easier way to state it.... your shorts should end closer to your knees than your nutz. We have a few repeat offenders of this rule and we are not going to take it anymore.

At times the tri-geeks show up in shorty shorts and while this is completely un-nerving to most, I have found that the tri-geeks go against the grain anyway. To be fair, we have tri-geeks who also comply with the shorts length rule.

Of course the women can wear any length shorts they desire.....in fact, the shorter the better.